[Dailydave] Syscan 2014 - Advanced Persistent Conference

[Ben Nagy]

Dear Readers,

We know that 2013 was a tumultuous year. RNG backdoors that we've known
about for barely 8 years. Stunning! The terrifying capacity of the NSA to
compromise iOS 2. Shocking! The Mandiant / FireEye merger. Bubbly!

We need a break from the US, dear colleagues, and a break from being owned
by the NSA. So, why not come to SyScan Singapore, and be owned by the
Chinese instead! As leading technologists like the evad3rs know, only
genuine Chinese rootkits are fully compatible with Chinese made hardware,
so why settle for less?

Once again, our glorious and lucky Security Conference ( 酒聚會 ) is
conveniently located at the magnificent:

Swissôtel Merchant Court
20 Merchant Road, Singapore

And will take place on the auspicious dates of 31 March - 4 April

The conference itself is on 3-4, but we have a selection of Great Fortune
Training Courses, listed at http://syscan.org/index.php/sg/training

In particular, Stefan Esser ( 大白猴子 ) on iOS 7 exploitation and m0nk_dot (
機器人殺手 ) on hardware hacking offer Super Prosperity!

I, personally, took Alex Ionescu( 中國人民解放軍綁架目標 )'s training course last
year, and it was a blast, but honestly, everything on the list is good.

And, with that, the main event.. the speakers ( 嘴發 )

Instead of a selection committee, we shuffled the submissions with
DUAL_EC_DRBG and took the top 17, which is an Auspicious Prime Number. By
some strange coincidence, the list consisted entirely of top class
speakers! We eagerly await their presentations on the official QiHoo360
Conference Projector!

1. Charlie Miller ( 最大的传媒妓女 ) & Chris Valasek ( 幸運醉 )

Car Hacking for "Poories" (中國客車司機)

2. Mark Dowd ( 公爵 )

"The Right Stuff: A spectral analysis of modal progressions in popular
music, 1980-1989"

3. Alex Ionescu ( 中國人民解放軍綁架目標 )

"All about the RPC, LRPC, ALPC and LPC in your PC"

4. snare ( 性感水獺 ) & rzn (羊羊羊羊羊羊羊)

"Thunderbolts and Lightning: Very Very Frightening"

5. Josh "Monk" Thomas ( 機器人殺手 )

"How to train your Snapdragon: Exploring Power Regulation Frameworks on
Android"

6. Nils & Jon Butler ( 英国鬼老 )

"Mission mPOSsible"

7. Alfredo Ortega ( 鳥仇敵 )

"Deep-Submicron Backdoor"

8. Corey Kallenberg

"Setup for Failure: Defeating SecureBoot"

9. Joxean Koret ( 巴斯克恐怖 )

"Breaking Anti-Virus Software"

10. Daniel Bilar

"Scientific Best Practices for recurrent problems in computer security R&D"

11. Dr Thaddeus (The) Grugq ( 瓜口 )

"Click and Dragger: Denial and Deception on Android Smartphones"

12. Georg Wicherski ( 中國人民解放軍綁架目標 )

"Linux Memory Forensics: A Real-Life case study"

13. Alex Plaskett & Nick Walker

"Navigating a sea of Pwn? : Windows Phone 8 AppSec"

14. Mathias Payer

"Embracing the new threat: towards automatically self-diversifying malware"

7 talks per day! 8 would have been luckier, but we need the space for
SPECIAL EVENTS!

At the end of Day 2, stay tuned for Whiskey Con - a unique cross between
Lightning Talks and a drinking game, where every shot buys you speaking
time! Or, put another way, the longer you can talk the more shots you get!
What could possibly go wrong?

But wait, there's more! To liven up the annual post-conference Networking
Party, we have squeezed in EXTRA SPEAKERS! What could be better than
leaving all your electronic devices with our friendly staff (for
safekeeping), and then relaxing over a meal and some craft beers; beguiled
by the dulcet tones of:

15. Dean Carter and Shahn Harris ( 妖失敗 )

"From New Zealand with Fail"

16. Anton Sapozhnikov

"Getting user credentials is not only admin's privilege"

17. @miaubiz ( 生日快樂 )

"Expr'ssing your heart's true desire with LLDB expressions"

All speakers at SyScan 2014 will not only receive a FREE USB storage
device, but I am led to believe that our generous sponsor, QiHoo360, is
prepared to offer Exciting Employment Opportunities ( may require
relocation ).

For the full speaker bios and talk descriptions, please compromise our
lovingly crafted PHP honeypot at
http://syscan.org/index.php/sg/program(best viewed on IE5), which
should be going live any time now.

And, with that, a hearty 恭禧發財, and, on behalf of our sponsors, we
congratulate you all on your democratic efforts to curb the outrageous
power of your NSA! Unity is Strength!

Cheers,

@rantyben
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